To the outside world, Ashley Allen lived a glamorous life. In reality, Socialite was trapped in a golden cage. “My party days started with excitement and wildness. I used to go to Vegas monthly – sometimes just for one night. Fly in, party, fly out the next morning – I returned to Bottle Service, Glam, when Pure Nightclub and Tao were hot spots and hosted real celebrities. Running around NYC where partying all the time was completely normal. Back in the day at Los Dukes, Sunset Marquis, and Hyde LA. In Aspen, it was the Caribou Club. I’ll hit Miami and see you at the Delano Hotel as much as I’d like to admit. I experience a wide range of things for that reason. I was exposed to the world of glamor. The free spirit, the unbounded attitude was fun for a while then the excitement subsided and emptiness, chaos, depression, isolation, anxiety and heavy shame came. There was the same feeling every night. The drama also felt like that. The embarrassment after drinking and what comes with it became heavier and heavier and the negative consequences came from my drinking. It was dark and I had no choice but to drink so I wouldn’t feel or think about my reckless behavior, the drama I caused the people I hit the night before. The next day the apology was getting old … for the people in my life and I was pretty openly sick of making them. I swear to myself and to others that I will change, unify my life and I will literally go out right after that day and drink all night long. Towards the end, I was worse than the party girl. I was an alcoholic and my addiction to alcohol got worse. I was on the verge of death and the party was over. The truth is, the party is over, and instead of being a frequent club hopper, I often face hospitalization and rehabilitation. “
Alcohol makes Ashley feel strong and irresistible – until her addiction begins to catch up with her. “I didn’t start drinking until I went to college in Texas. I remember I drank my first sip of alcohol and felt strong, big, important, beautiful, fearless. I became a costume designer for film and television and my addiction to this environment grew where my behavior became ‘normal’. I hid my drinking for many days. At the moment, my drinking has become a necessity. I have to go through the shaking and withdrawal if I don’t have it. I didn’t know how to act with a calm mind. Working on different films has worked for me and my addiction. I’ll end a show and move on to a new show when things start to fall apart, or people find out my privacy. My addiction followed me everywhere, so naturally it paved the way for me to go to LA. Once in LA, it became more normal for me because of the people I hang out with, not necessarily the city. I love Los Angeles. I’ve calmed down here. “Many are tempted by the LA party scene, so it’s important to keep your head on your shoulder.” Stay, protect your heart and maintain a healthy self-esteem. ”
She decided to launch her own fashion brand, Former Party Girl L.A., As a way to free yourself from the cycle of shame. “I was an angry drunkard and shame kept me spiraling and sick for so long. I couldn’t share with anyone what I was going through or what was behind all the glamor and partying – emptiness, suicidal thoughts, anxiety and intense frustration for fear that people would not like me or think I was ‘problem’ and I did. Honestly, everyone saw that I had a problem, I was late to the party and found out the last! The former party girl used humor for me and denied the shame that sometimes pops up for me for past mistakes and behaviors. It took me a while to forgive myself for what I did in my addiction. I realized that I must love that part of me. I must love the girl I was – she was lost and I was afraid to admire and respect that girl. Those experiences gave me purpose. I now have a brand that helps others understand that life without drugs and alcohol is amazing. I used to drink to feel the true joy that I am feeling today. My favorite product is the best-selling ‘NOT VODKA’ water bottle and side note: I used to drink vodka from the water bottle. I thought it was a shameful act in the past, so I now embrace it with humor. I can’t tell you how many people told me they did it too. That’s why X-Party Girl started. When I tell my story, I allow you to tell. This brand is my story. I hope it saves lives and can talk to people about what’s happening I want to get well and talk normally about difficult things. Pain and addiction grow into silence. “
A key element in encouraging others to face their addiction is to ignore the way society perceives and reacts to it. “In my opinion, alcohol culture is different from addiction. I just know that I don’t drink like other people, and I know that deep down in my roots. I have no problem with people drinking alcohol. I serve it at my dinner party and have many friends who usually drink and enjoy themselves. I have alcohol and I have a problem. My platform on shame and addiction is directed towards a society that does not understand addiction and gives shame to those who inadvertently or intentionally fight it. Society can send the message that it is not ‘cold’ if you show your struggle or get real. We look at Instagram and see people go on vacation, have seemingly perfect relationships and we think we must be like that. If we give any indication that our life is not perfect, we will be revealed and judged. We are just ashamed of intoxication. We humans or people don’t need the feeling to judge us. Let’s make it true. Many people, including many celebrities, are coming out with their stories and struggles with addiction and mental health, which is helping to make it extraordinarily normal. I want you to feel safe to share. Shame has plagued me for over 12 years and I don’t want that to be your story. ”
Ashley had to hit the rock bottom to get to the top. “Despair saw her window and I took it as a turning point. Despair was a gift to me. Ill and tired of being tired. Sick of being physically ill, mentally ill, lonely, isolated, depressed, hopeless. Despair calmed me.” I had a strong spiritual experience early in the recovery and I know that my life has been saved so I will help others. The agreement I made: to move it forward. Love me despite being a brand that I hope will reach others and my family and I’m much closer than ever before. I have two dogs, I love playing the piano, hosting dinner parties, doing yoga and gardening. I’m from Los Angeles. A part of a nationally ranked all-women service organization that works wonders in the community.I work with men at a drug and alcohol treatment center two days a week and once That’s why my friends like to listen to me and no longer block or screen my calls. I know I’m a miracle. I am in so much gratitude and two years later (confirmed date 2.25.20), I still cry when I share how it was and how it is now. I live my life now and I don’t want to run away from it anymore. I used to drink the way I normally feel today. Not only did I become the woman I was supposed to be, but I was better. “
She wants customers to find new ways to embrace their future. “Ex-party girls are fun! It’s not about being boring or old. It’s the opposite. Be brave, be loud and live your best life. I can’t tell you how many messages I’ve received from people who share their stories or with a product. Detects. ” He sees his own experience as a badge of honor. “I am a warrior… a happy warrior. I’m not ashamed. “Beware of new things coming from her brand!” The ex-party girl’s work contains many exciting things, but one thing I can share is an interactive, fun, workbook that will be available later this summer. ” Be sure to check out Their website Like!
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Ex-party girl brings moderation to fashion and fun. Photo Credit: Ashley Allen and Millie Romero PR.